no more tea!

saw 2 loads of friends today and drank tea and chatted. Its so nice knowing friends are happy to listen. I know some people dont know what to say but all my friends and family have been wonderful.

Darren feels good today, again he walked to the school with me and even cooked dinner as I was at Tanisha at her dance class. Half way though she burst into tears for no reason. I had to explain to the teacher that there is a lot going on at home and that her dad has cancer and shes tearful some days. If anyone is going though this, I would truely recommend a charlie brown book called "why, charlie brown, why". Although it is about a child having cancer, its still helpful.

I have decided that once this is all over Im going to write a set of childrens books, with Tanisha's help, explaining to children about parents with cancer. There needs to be more done for them, its such a huge impact on them, especially for children with AS ect.

Im going back to work tomorrow. Im looking forward to something normal but am hoping I can hold it together. I rarely cry, but somedays are worse than others, and sometimes it just hits me like a train.

This cancer has taken over every part of our lifes in the last 2 weeks. Its feels so much longer. I want a day off, but never happens. Its taken over and is sitting next to me on the sofa, laying nexting to me in bed, and is follwoing me like my shadow.